It's been quite sometime since my last post, but I've been a busy bee! I have had some pretty rough weigh in's the past few weeks, but lots of emotional baggage on my mind to go along with it. I am keeping it 100% real. I guess that's my burden to bear, holding onto things inside that I can do nothing about. I am still trying to figure out how to not allow people or things to take such a piece of me. I'm not at all saying u can't be a true friend or anything like that. Allowing people and things, to have a negative impact on my life, rather than a positive 1, is where I'm struggling. Even though the food is no longer a strong hold in my life, it seems like unfortunately the emotional aspect is still there in some ways. I have 4 kids so u can imagine the busy life I lead. 3 of the 4 are actively involved in a sport at this time, which has challenged my routine of workouts as well as my stress load. I have got to find balance. I've been reminded recently of the calgon commercials. Just sitting in a tub soothing all the stress away. Keep in mind this is all in dreamland, not reality...lol. I haven't found that kind of escape that man has made. I find peace in praying and seeking God's wisdom in my life. I do also find such joy & freedom in my workouts. Lets face it, we all have times in our life that we are just in blah mode, as I call it. I'm NOT in a depression, praise God, just tripped on a few pieces of life's traps.
This past tuesday I had already planned on doing a double zumba, which I haven't done in close to 2 weeks. My husband, wound up having, to get a tooth pulled and I thought there would be no way, I could do even 1 zumba. He however let me know real quick that I was still going to make them. My instructor was on vacation for a week, so I knew going into that zumba I was gonna have my butt kicked ;o) This is the zumba instructor that is the most cardio intense. I was in for a bigger surprise than that! About 2 songs into her class, a new song came on. It was Survivor, by Destiny's Child. It was like a moment in time I will never forget. Within just a few words of it starting I began to have overwhelming emotion building up. I began to tear up pretty bad, but had to recompose to be able to finish the zumba class. I have always liked that song, but the words were just what I needed to re spark the fire inside. Even though the song is not that long, I began to remember the things I've been through in the past, the things I'm going through now, and see the tiger within. We did some punching moves and each move was more and more intense as I began to see myself as the fighter I was born to be. After that class, I didn't expect anymore, what I call, life changing moments, but I was in for a shock. I went onto the next zumba class and after a few songs, I walked to my water bottle which happend to be up front and in eye view of the instructor. It was in that moment, she had started talking about how Zumba really does work and how there are many stories of women who have lost inches. She then looks over at me and says - you've lost what 1 1/2 inches? (Keep in mind everyone was watching me, 76 women - I was so embarrassed.) I said no a little more than 6 inches around my mid section and I made a circular motion around my waist. Everyone in the class started cheering and clapping! See it's in these moments in my life, I know God is looking down smiling at me saying a job well done my child.
I will be changing my workouts up and changing some of what I eat up to jump start the weight coming back off. I will be blogging soon about more weight loss ;o)
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